When the wrong things become offensive.

Wednesday evening Jeremy told me he had special plans for us! I was excited, there are few times since the family expanding that we have had a date that involved special plans vs running errands or checking things off the to do list while we were kidless! To my surprise he had gotten us tickets to see David Crowder Band in concert! How fabulous!

While we were there we were introduced to an organization that is connected with the work Bono is doing called "One" Organization.  My heart has been feeling stretched in so many ways with a huge perplexing issue. Since our trip to Ethiopia, and being part of seeing the extreme poverty there but also seeing the effects of that poverty still in the eyes of my little boy every day I have felt anguish over what to do! In the meantime I have been reading, "Kisses from Katie" a story of a twenty something girl that has given up everything for others.  I was intrigued by the ONE organization, they just needed my name and email and zip code to petition for aid for famine and relief for the hungry and hurting in Africa. So today I logged on to facebook and decided to give them a look up! I was sorta floored. Floored shocked, and then after my shock settled I was amazed with myself and the lesson I had learned. I'd like to share it with you!

If you go to the ONE organization facebook page  you will see a video that pops up. Them being at the David Crowder Concert, I assumed to find a emotional, compassionate, video to promote me to sign up for their cause. To my surprise I was caught off guard. The video started with a several people saying F***, over and over again, and my eyes were wide and confused and thinking David Crowder what are you thinking! LOL Then After several people ended their words, with beeping, they began saying one word... FAMINE, FAMINE, FAMINE, FAMINE....... as they started talking I was posed with a question of my own. Why was this word F***. So Offensive to me? The emotions it provoked made my heart race, it made me want to do something to stop it from happening, it made me want to act and to tell them to stop. Then the thought occurred. What has become offensive to me, in one word has created more emotion to me than something that followed it. FAMINE. Something so much worse. Something that is man made, something that takes life, something that can be stopped, something we can be offended by, yet so often we choose to be offended by the wrong thing. We fight to stop things that hurt nothing, but choose to ignore the things that flood countries and wipe out thousands. If we took the harshness we feel about these little things with the same intensity to the realness of what we can do something about, what could we do? Could we start changing our sights on the minimal words that might not be so offensive after all in comparison to the word that follows. I agree with the ONE campaign, FAMINE is a much more offensive word.


Click Here to See ONE video.

Brotherly Love.

Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor.

Romans 12:9-10

I was thinking back about 8 months ago when Tadios stepped into our home speaking no English. And for Zadyn meeting his new brother for the first time was quite terrifying. If you think about it, they had no way to communicate. But on specific day they both were forced into brother-hood.

I think about what these photos say about these boys today. And tears stream down my face at the hurdles they have overcome. Two boys not related by blood, culture, having no similarities except one, they are practically the same age. Which could have for them spelled disaster in every form.  When I see these photos I guess what is so intoxicating about them is the pure genuine love they have for each other. That what started out terrifying for them both, has been a journey like no other, they have found their best friends, they have become brothers. They have over come sharing a room together, being the youngest together, they have learned how to teach each other who they are without a language. A knot starts to form in my throat just thinking about the love that has developed between these brothers. Something so fantastic, so complex but yet so simple. I admire the love they have for each other, it is remarkable that 8 months later they see not the differences in each other as a division to a friendship but an opening to new kind of love. That of a brother. 

Transition: A Baby on the way!

Today I was driving with Tadios and he noticed a tree that had already turned for fall. He shouted, “Mom, look that tree it’s a rainbow!” Then it came to me that for Tad this is not normal, trees stay green all year they don’t turn colors, he has never experience this new season called Fall! 

There have been many new seasons in our life lately! More than most families could handle I would say! LOL Tad has been apart of our family now 7 months and we all would agree we don’t remember life without him. It’s as if he has always been here. We moved about a month ago downtown and absolutely love our new community and home. It has been a transition but a wonderful one! Zadyn started Kindergarten, and Tad started preschool. I thought I wasn’t going to be super emotional but when my shy Ethiopian boy walked into his preschool room, and greeted everyone with a huge smile and said, “ HI! I am Tad, what is your name?” And ran to give his teacher a hug, I burst into tears! My little boy had transitioned beautifully.  So many changes some fast some slow. Just like the leaves we forget to see the gradual transition of things in our life. Sometimes they just happen because we forget to see things with eyes like Tad new ones. We miss out on the excitement of the slow transition of the colors changing and merging us into this new season called Fall! 

This week we received an answer to prayer that has been 6 years in the making. One that has taken many years to see change and now we are finally seeing the colors of this coming into our lives! We as a family yet again enter on another journey to Ethiopia together! This time to finally meet this little sister that Awan since she was 2 years old has been praying for. I remember her so small praying her sweet words, “ Be with my sister.” Awan. You don’t have a sister. “Yes, my sister in Africa.” She prayed these words for 4 more years until we as a family made the decision to adopt two children from Africa. Tad just happen to come to us first! But Tuesday this prayer was answered. We got to see for the first time Awan’s sister in Africa. She is a beautiful wide-eyed 4 month old little girl. Words can say how excited we are! We have decided to call her Samiah. I love one of the photos her eyes are as wide as they can be she is in complete awe of the camera flash! lol We bursted out laughing at her the poor thing, being humiliated at age 4 months!  Zadyn thinks it's her response to having him as a brother! We laughed and laughed! 

We now wait! We don’t expect a court date till after the first of the year but we don’t know for sure. We will travel to Ethiopia the first trip to meet her and go to court, and visit we hope her area and Tad’s area out of the city which we have yet to do.  Once we have approval at court and she is legally ours. I can't post photos until then. So no photos! Sorry! Then we wait for an Embassy Appointment, that could be 4 months or as we have known others who have waited much longer. So I guess all in all she will get here when she is good and ready! LOL We in the mean time will continue to poor out love for our other three kids and anticipate the changes that will redefine us as a family tree once again! 

Moving On. Finally.

It was three and a half years ago that one Sunday Jeremy and I took a drive down some downtown streets and it ended us up on 5th street. We noticed a man and a boy about 7 moving furniture out by themselves. We couldn't help but pull over and see if they needed some help. Jeremy jumped out to see what he could do. I noticed that Jeremy wasn't picking up anything. About 30 min later not moving anything for this man he got back in the car. I was confused. Why didn't you help him? Jeremy said, quietly... I think I did. I listened.

Come to find out, he had been paying payments to a lady for his home and well, she didn't. She lost the home and took his money.

 To be honest with you, growing up most of my life on the farm and in our newer housing addition, I was embarrassed that I had first of all never been down half the streets in my own town, but also had ignored the heart ache that was happening just miles in my own town. You see Jeremy I we were on the only path we knew. The American Dream. We had a home in a great housing addition,  were working hard for us. This moment was redefining for me. I remember sitting in the car thinking. Oh no, what if God calls me to move downtown?

What happened next was an extreme passion to help people like this man. To listen, bring them hope and help bring a renewed spirit to the hopeless. We began building relationships downtown, little by little, and soon enough we even found ourselves switching to a Church downtown. Our whole lives in a short time had been not so focused on the dream we had once thought was the only option for us, but found that bringing hope was a better dream for us.

Three years ago we decided to sell our house. We placed the sign in the yard, and to my immature faith I assumed that overnight the offers would roll in and our new dream to move downtown would be just minutes away. Isn't that always the stories you hear? I was called and before we could put that sign in the yard we had an offer! Year one, year two, and this spring.. year three past. No offers. Not even one.

The battle raged inside me. Why at first did I not want to move there and now it is my hearts desire? We had placed our whole calling on one thing. Our house selling. Just when I would give up someone would call to see the house. Jeremy and I still felt like God was asking us to move. And we wanted to be listen. But how if this house would not sell?


I started reading a book that challenged logical decision vs emotional decision according to what God asks you to do. Point in case. David and Goliath. Not logical, emotional.  I began to see that maybe God wanted us to just move. Today in the economy logical advice would be NEVER do two mortgages. There was a voice in our hearts that said we should. We should GO.

We took a step of faith and made an offer on a beautiful home, on yes, you guessed it. Beloved 5th street. A street I have had the opportunity to pray daily for, over the past 3 years. It has become my hearts desire, and this home is more than anything I could have ever imagined for Jeremy and I to raise our family in. I am amazed at this journey. It has been so painful at times. Wondering if God had been mistaken, was that call for us? Where we to move there?

The day after we received an accepted offer on our new home. We leased our current home for 3 years. It's almost comical to me how one step of faith leads to an open window. The whole time  I was looking for this wide open door of our house selling. It never happened.  But what did happen was greater. I have learned that it takes a mixture of dependence on God and a confidence in his calling big enough just go where he asks even if it requires waiting. I am so glad we did.

We will finally be closing on our new house this Friday. And this long journey of moving downtown will be behind us. But a new journey begins. Our life on 5th street is about to open up new doors, and new windows and we are so excited to see where they will lead us!

Where Does Grace Fall

I have read many heart felt posts about the verdict for Casey Anthony.  I think as Mom's we want justice especially when children are involved. But I tend to think that as we poke aim at this woman for something really we are speculating or guessing or we think we have a gut feeling about.  So often our sense of justice means taking life for life. Eye for eye, tooth for tooth? Don't we always forget to read on.... it gives us more hints to help heal our hurt for our injustice we feel.  For some reason inside us we think that our hearts will mend if someone else pays for an injustice that happened to someone else. The reality is. It does nothing. We only lose another life. I know this is controversial and my opinion will not be accepted by very many, but I do tend to feel that in our need to seek justice we forget why we wanted it in the first place.

We degrade the people who took time out of their lives to sit on the jury stand away from their families who sit and listened to this day in and day out and say they made a wrong choice. We say they had the easy job of terminating another life. Hum. Not so sure I would have been able to with stand being away from my kids, listening to that information, dealing with what they have to deal with for now and forever and now the rest of America criticizing their time, while we sit back and say we have more information and better discernment then them? 

I think we forget that people good or bad all deserve life. If we choose that we are pro life people we  should stand by that for people of all ages. The unborn and mothers that make mistake.  I we believe in Christ's resurrection power then we believe that life for her is the winning solution here, she has a second chance here to relive a legacy for her little girl, to change her choices and to find the Grace she so deserves. The Grace we get every morning. The grace we get when we have "murdered" someones character without knowing the full truth to the story or what really happened.  If this sweet girl's life was taken by her mother well, we know what kind of hell she is living in every day, with the loss of missing her laugh, her dancing feet, seeing her smile, don't we forget that in the systems of life in general there is a "justice" of our own torture that we face. I think that is true for this mom. My fear is that we as the American public have offered her no life beyond this, given her no hope that she can be more than a murderer, and given her no chance at grace. I will be the first to say, I am praying for restoration. I am not praying for justice. I am praying for grace. For someone to offer open arms of love, forgiveness, and support to family that is living in a world that hates them.  I guess I hope that grace falls before justice this time.

Beauty instead of Ashes. ( Through the eyes of Tadios)

"to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the LORD for the display of his splendor." Isaiah 61:3 

I have been on a life long journey unsure of my own beauty. Not that I thought I was repulsive or anything, but I guess for me my self confidence and freedom to be me has been a life long struggle. It has been a pursuit or rather battle field of the mind. I battle with what people think of me a lot! Wondering if they like me or what they really are thinking of me and how I am "put together".  I think as  girls we probably all would admit some kind of insecurity. But for me I guess mine has gone deeper to my spiritual life. I have begun to see myself as only ashes. Ashes of sin. Day after day looking in the mirror I would see the reflection of a burnt pile of ashes. I would be reminded of my sinful nature and the humble stature that I must repent and admit my sin to God in fear of judgement. Maybe it is the message that is so often thrown our way. Repent, be saved. YA DA YADA...

Sounds pretty grey. I began to wonder why is this called the "Good News"? It doesn't feel so good. I felt so dead, and if this life was to feel abundant why did I feel so bad? 

I think so often in our society we begin to focus so much on  sin and judgement. We would rather debate who is right and who is wrong, That we end up forgetting the real Gospel. God is on our side. (Period.) If you are poor. God is on your side. If you are sick. He is on your side. If you are confused. He is on your side. If you are alone. He is on your side. If you are depressed. He is on your side. If you are insecure. He is on your side. If you are angry with him. He is on your side. If you are addicted to something. He is on your side.  The reality of the good news is that God is on our side. He is for US. Why do we miss that? Why do we only hear the doom and gloom? Why is the message so grey? Why do we only hear sin and judgement and hell?

The good news is about trading our ashes for a crown of beauty. It is about God restoring us not him demolishing us. Why do we forget that this story is about restoration.

The reality of my life in Christ has become so real in the last week and half. The good news has been a reality lived out in a 4 year old boy who has been given a second chance at living again. 

I can't tell you how enslaved I have been. How I have been reluctant to move my arms in the air in case I look silly, afraid of what would others might think! My insecurities had overtaken me. Not sure who has been given the good news. Tad or us. I think we are experiencing as a family what Christ said in John 10:10 

" I came so that they may have life more abundantly." 

Life is different. We are living life through the eyes of a child who is living life as if he is apart of the kingdom of heaven. He is wide eyed. Everything for him is a miracle here. Life here is a blessing just to wake up and know that his shoes are there waiting on him every morning when he awakes. 

It's time stopping. Just to run outside to experience snow falling and really feeling it hit your face and feeling the cold as if you have never felt what cold feels like. And laughing, with joy, with each flake as it hits your nose because you can.  He is teaching us how to really live. How silly we were to think we were going to teach him.

For me the good news is in watching him eat his first bite of ice cream, and grinning with excitement and confusion of brain freeze. You see two weeks ago Tadios was in Addis Ababa, alone. Yes he had us waiting for him but he was still 7,000 miles from us waiting, shy and not talking or interacting very much. One year ago in his three year old little life his mother, out of desperation, had to say good bye to him. Had to kiss his forehead and squeeze him one last time. I can't comprehend the heart ache for her and the devastation for Tadios. He was not only poor, alone, and lost, but he was an orphan. He was ashes.

They say that when he came to the orphanage his hair was yellow because of starvation. I don't share these details of his background lightly. They are personal. But I want you to understand where he was in his little life. At the bottom. I am sure some of us have felt like God has given up on us. Or maybe like me I am insecure at times and unsure he has enough love for me. But the essence of the good news is in the adoption story of Tadios. 

We are all adopted. Tadios has a choice to accept us. He can reject me as a mom or accept me. He can deny my love and my gifts or accept them it's up to him. There are times he hates me when I am holding him body locked in bed and he is kicking and screaming and rivers of tears are flooding his bed because he does not trust I know what is best for him, I get that. That is the same with God though, I think he gets that too. He understands our immaturity. But loves us all the same. 

The good news is that God is ready to wake up to do life with you. Like we are with life with Tad. God is ready to experience it with you. Tonight we did a bubble bath in my garden tub! Hilarious! We filled it to the top and warned him it would be loud! Started the jets, and he went wild! He started slapping the water or wahoo, as if it were attacking him personally, screaming like a wild man, until he realized it was making the bubbles in tub grow, then with more joy then I have ever seen in my life, he began to laugh and yell, bubbles!!!! bubbles!!! I started crying over his joy. I have never seen joy like this before. This is the good news. 

Once he got out of the tub I noticed he had a cut and was bleeding I kissed his knee grabbed a box of bandaids and grabbed a blue one and fixed it up for him. With pride he ran to Daddy and showed him his knee. I told Jeremy. That bandaid, is more than a bandaid to him you know.  He smiled and said, yes, " It's means he has a Mom." 

Tadios finds joy in the tinish "little" things. He started this morning playing with a yellow balloon he got from Tree of Life with his favorite animal a lion on it, and as of 7pm this evening it was still in his hands. He cherishes everything. 

He spent one evening with a small paper airplane and Uncle Layne flying them off our balcony over and over again, excited for another new adventure with life with his family. 

Daddy to Tad is his favorite thing. He is always making sure he is in sight or nearby watching. He runs up his bunk bed ladder and down just to have Jeremy catch him and to do it all over again, and repeat for hours. He is happy. He is joyful. 

My favorite thing about Tadios is that he breaks into dancing. When he gets really excited he stops everything and does a 20 second tribal dance. He has begun to break the chains that have been so tightly bound around my arms and legs. I notice that I start to dance with him. He doesn't laugh and say you are to silly Mama. Or someone might think you are stupid. He says, "GOBEZ!!" MAMA" GOBEZ! and shows me a new move to try. Each day he is breaking the chains of my insecurities and showing me a life of freedom in Christ. One not bound by what others think but one dancing in joy in front of his Savior. Why? Good. News. 

Tadios, is no longer living a life of ashes. He is not starving. He is no longer on a pathway to death, he is no longer alone, he is not poor, he is not an orphan anymore. Tadios has traded his ashes for a crown of beauty and is now a Child of God. Adopted and accepted to the kingdom of heaven. We too,can live and breath and participate in  his kingdom everyday if we just decide to experience it with God.  Heaven is not just when we die, heaven is now. Tadios, understands this. He is living there.

Because of Tadios I am ready to trade my ashes for a crown of beauty. I am no longer going to act as if I am an abandoned rejected orphan not good enough for anyone, questioning myself and being insecure. I am going to step boldly with my son, leading me, dancing, experiencing what my Father has to give me. He has adopted me just the same. And the same joy that Tadios is experiencing is the same joy we can experience as we follow Christ. How exciting! 

What new things will we all do and be apart of tomorrow! I can't wait! Life = joy.  God has traded Tadios's morning for joy. This little shy boy we picked up a week and half ago is now a new creation, he is a beautiful in every way. And teaching me more about who God is, his loving restoration, acceptance and love for us all.   

Christmas Day, Again.

We have been experiencing Christmas again here. Yesterday was Christmas at the Rees house. We all woke up before Tad. Jeremy went in and slept on Zadyn's  bunk till Tad woke up so he wasn't lost since he fell asleep in the car on the way home from the airport. We decided not to wake him and just let him sleep.

But he slept great! And he woke up about 9:30 as if he had been asking for over a year for one thing... a family. He came sliding out ready to explore his new house! He was most excited about the wosha's our dogs. His favorite is "Buna". He can carry Buna. But hasn't gotten the concept that the wosha has a name.The first thing he asks for before he even gets out of bed is his shoes. He has to have shoes on no matter what! And is so excited about clothes. He didn't get to take anything with him. He brought a pillowcase with him and that is it. So he is thrilled that he gets to pick what shoes or clothes he gets to wear! Zadyn decided to go out and bring in a cup of sleet to show him and Tad kept saying co cazza!!! Which is COLD!! Tad is adjusting so well. Each moment for Tad is as if he is unwrapping a new package. He likes getting water out of our refrigerator, he likes light switches, and is excited that water comes out of facets. He likes feeding his food to the wosha's the dogs. LOL  I got him a tooth brush which he had never had. He had only used his finger. It scared Zadyn because Tad's teeth are so sensitive he started brushing and his teeth started bleeding, and Zadyn freaked out. But he's a good big brother and was there to help Tad! Awe! But Tad's tooth brush is a Thomas the train and it plays a song, it has been going since I brought it home. Tad has the song memorized now. He keeps singing it. How cute! We gave Buna a bath and then he decided he needed one too! And loves baths! He likes to be head first blowing bubbles.

I am amazed with his transition. He is so happy. He loves us so much and us him. Zadyn has had some issues losing his spot as the baby of the family, but we are hanging out today. Lexie came today to take Awan to a movie so she was thrilled! And Tadios is watching his first movie Veggie Tales and is laughing and giggling! My aunt and uncle and cousin and Mam-maw came yesterday and Tad was so great with them. He colored a beautiful picture, better than I could do! He can count 1-10 in English and Amharic and knows most of his colors.  He acts older at times than 4 but he has times he acts younger too.

He is silly! He runs outside when he has the chance! Around the bushes and has no regard for the road. We run after him and chase him down! LOL.

Tad has brought us back to the simple things. He is showing us joy in the simple things of cleaning up dishes and the joy he finds in doing it for his Family. He is loving it! It's his excitement in things he's never seen, like ceiling fans, slides and certain food. Yesterday and today has been Christmas again through the eyes of Tadios and the joy of a little boy who has wanted only one thing. His family.