Waiting in CONFIDENCE.

Expect with CONFIDENCE that what is unseen 

is just underneath the horizon.

This is a time of the unknown for us. With adoption so often there are times of extended waiting and then times of complete chaos getting papers ready, more waiting, traveling, passing court, and then more waiting. This time the waiting feels different. There is a feeling of a wide hole exposed and feeling barren. It's like being handed your baby after 9 months of work and labor, and then they tell you to go and wait  an undisclosed amount of time to be able to bring him or her home. We couldn't really imagine that. So experiencing it brings this disoriented feeling to me. I think I must look like I am just spinning my wheels not sure what direction to head!

We have also had some uncertainty with our house. We just about get to the point we forget it's still for sale! LOL  Then we get an interested prospect. We now have two. So I am feeling the unknown feeling of, "Are we moving?" "Are we not?" "Will it be to much for Tad?"  "Could it happen before we get him?" To much thinking is what my husband says! Which doesn't help to much.

My mom is always reading my posts. She has a skill at reminding me of my own words by saying. I heard a girl once say, " And quotes me word for word as a reminder that I so often forget what I know to be true!"

I kind of did that to myself today, reading some old post and feeling weepy about my unknowing circumstances. And I read a post I had posted early on that was entitled "Hope Rising." My first paragraph said this... 

At every horizon, the sun rises and the sun sets.
And under every horizon God is working on things unseen.

I was thinking about a verse this week, and then a friend suggested I read Hebrews 11. And whaalaah, it was the passage I had been thinking about. It is the Faith chapter.

Hebrews 11:1

"Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen." 

The rest of Hebrew 11 is a retelling of stories of Spiritual Faith. Stories about people just like us that instead of focusing on the unknown they had faith in the assurance of what God had already promised them in the future.

The Greek word for assurance is hypostasis, which means CONFIDENCE.  That we have CONFIDENCE of the things hoped for.  Faith is described with two words. CONFIDENCE, and CONVICTION.

Often times when we like to use the word, HOPE, we have this vague hope grounded in this imaginary idea of something, maybe even more like wishful thinking. But the word used here is not our kind of HOPE, it is CONFIDENCE. It is solid and secure. It is not vague.

Which leads me the other word faith is described as, CONVICTION.  A CONVICTION according to my google dictionary, says it is a FIRM thought or belief. Something that is not whimsical or vague but sharp and defined. Solid, and not flexible.

So putting this one verse into full meaning...Faith is the CONFIDENCE in things we have been given CONFIDENCE in. ( So that is probably clear as gravy!)  Stay with me. They are things that are fixed and solid, never changing and true to us. Faith moves past what we can see, not just the things that our eyes tell us that are confident, and firm. Spiritual faith goes beyond to even the things we have not yet seen. Faith is a settled CONFIDENCE that something in the future that has not yet been seen but has been CONVICTED to you, or made firm to you will happen and will be. Let's rather say it like this,  it is a PROMISE by God that will come to pass, and God will bring it to the horizon for us to see. How can we know this? Because our faith is something we are CONFIDENT in and CONVICTED in.

We hear this phrase about faith, "A leap in the dark." Or a "Leap of Faith". We get confused when we describe Spiritual Faith this way. Spiritual Faith is not a leap into "nothing" it is not "vague", it is actually the opposite. It is a LEAP of CONFIDENCE, that what we have been CONVICTED or PROMISED and we are CONFIDENT we will land not wavering but standing firm.

In this time of waiting. It is easy to focus on the unseen. The calendar with no return date for Tad, and the hole that engulfs my heart because I  am 10,000 miles away from him.  I can look at the uncertainty of each prospective buyer for our house and toss out a hopeful, wish, but this is not Spiritual faith. This is not trusting in the unseen. This is not having CONFIDENCE in what God has personally REVEALED, CONVICTED, and PROMISED to me.

Now it is by CONFIDENCE OF THINGS THAT WILL COME BECAUSE OF THE PROMISE CHRIST HAS GIVEN ME THAT THEY WILL BE.

It was 4 years ago, our hearts was CONVICTED. God spoke into our hearts and there, a little boy was conceived. So it is with CONFIDENCE that I look forward to the unseen, and know he will be home with us. I have been given God's promise and I can be CONFIDENT in his CONVICTION.

It was 3 years ago, that the same kind of CONVICTION came to us. We felt a small still firm voice tell us to MOVE into a part of town that hasn't seen Jesus lately. And with great CONFIDENCE we have had our house on the market even in the worst housing market in history. We don't have to count our losses when our house is turned down by someone again, and again. We can stand firm in CONFIDENCE, that the Lord CONVICTED our hearts and has PROMISED to move us even though it is unseen to us now.We can stand firm in the things we hope for because we have faith and confidence that he will be there to fulfill what he says.

It is by Faith, we read in Hebrews about many who God gave Promises and Convictions. And we see in all of them his Promises were held true and where firm! What proof for us to believe in CONFIDENCE with them. And trust he will do the same for us just as he promises here.

Now I see the child conceived in my heart as a rock that is not movable. So embassy dates or not, my faith can be firm in the promise that God has given me. That Tad is my son, and his is most defiantly apart of our future. We can't see the date on the horizon line, but think what God can see just below it! I imagine it is a pretty amazing view for all of us!

So here is my challenge.  If you are burdened by things you can't see or control, make a list of the things God has been CONVICTING you or PROMISING you. Stand firm and be CONFIDENT in his PROMISES, and then all of the unseen things will fade away and you will step into the life in which God has asked you to Leap into. with CONFIDENCE .Not hoping or wishing he is there to help you land, but knowing he will!

** We are confident that Tad is our son and  and we know he will be home with us soon. We pray in confidence Lord that you will make a way for him to be here in our arms quickly, but we have CONFIDENCE in you that you are wiser, you are stronger and you know exactly what we all need. We have Spiritual Faith that you will lead us all home in faith. It is in you that we have CONFIDENCE and that you are not something not vague and not hopeful, but TRUE.